stag dos - and stag don'ts...

*******************************

paedophilia,
to a deer, is nothing more
than fawnication...

*******************************








"Is a fawn a little deer?" - "Depends how much you want to pay"...









('Wham bam(bi), thank you, ma'am': 17 Syllables)

when every day's a "when?"sday...

****************************

our priest's become so
scatty, he doesn't even
know what deities...

****************************


















(17 Rather Syllables)

from the richest of foods to untold riches...

******************************************************************

If a calorie contains 4.18400 joules, and one carrot
contains 41 calories, then how many carats are there in
the family joules?

******************************************************************


















No jewels in our family. Just the one little gem - which we're having for tea...

you know it's highly strung, grandad...

****************************************

Grandad just made a
parachute jump! (He sneaked up
on it and yelled "boo!")

****************************************




(A reliable parachute will always let you down. Gently.)




(17 Very Sillybles)

property ladder blues: just a coffee for me...

*************************************

always remember,
son: today's flat white could be
tomorrow's house red...

*************************************








(a coffee today, a semi and a Semillon tomorrow - a man can dream)









('The high Costa living': 17 Syllables)

(no) sex in the city...

********************************************

"My girlfriend comes from
West London" - "Feltham?" - "No, she
won't bloody let me!"...

********************************************


















('Go to town? No chance': 17 Syllables)

a kitchen with a witchin (sorry, gran)

***************************************

Look who's eating bread
and dripping! "Gran, couldn't you
have found a towel first?"...

***************************************








- forget 'aprés-ski', think 'aprés-shower': it's the stuff of wet dreams nightmares...









('Dripping': the middle-age old-age spread of choice: 17 Syllables)