********************************************************

I'll always stand for the National Anthem. I'll

never stand for not being allwed to sing it!...

(No singing to be allowed on Armistice Day)

********************************************************

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LIVID-19 - fury at yet more restrictions...

-------------------------------------------------------------

"I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of Here!" say 

they've introduced a raft of measures to maintain 

safety. Knowing "I'm A Celebrity", it's probably 

a white-water raft and not THAT safe!...

-------------------------------------------------------------

would you (cr)edit it!...

******************************

to say my cooking's

incredible's almost true:

it's in(  )edible!...

******************************

(Cooking with gas(troenteritis?):17 Rather Syllabubs)

No wonder he's not on many steering committees...

**************************************************

Police probe Starmer prang (news item). 

Could it be that he was driving without 

due Keir and attention?... 

************************************************** 

------------------------------------------------------

Tasteless vintage relics? Love 'em! So much 

so, 'er indoors says I've turned our whole 

damned house into a bleedin' kitsch-en!...

------------------------------------------------------

The message for the Tories is pretty damned

clear: look after the North, or watch your 

fortunes head south. End of...

------------------------------------------------------

Pubs, please note: no way can a triangular 

slice of pizza be classified as a square meal.

(Vincent Hefter, Daily Mail, October 29)

------------------------------------------------------

November 5th dinner...

****************************************************

"It's Catherine wheels &

mash tonight." - "Why Catherine wheels?" -

"I don't like bangers"...

****************************************************

(17 Syllables)

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"I can't find 'George Bush the oak' anywhere in the family tree." -

"I'm not surprised. I think you'll find it's George Bush the elder"...

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Rubbish Bin Laden, he was another...

---------------------------------------------

You've got to hand it to the guy: an 'oh, so presidential' Trump

calls everyone garbage as only trash can...

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Now Melania's recovered from Covid, I'm told she's going to hit 

the campaign trail - and pretend it's Donald...

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Singer loses 7 stone...

*****************************************

If Adele's worth her

weight in gold, then she's just lost

a bleedin' fortune!...

******************************************

(17 Syllables)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

If Matt Hancock is indeed an 'infuriating pygmy' (Daily

Mail), then I'm a Dutchman. Yours, etc, Piet van Rjkaard...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Prince Harry says he had to walk in Meghan's shoes to

understand unconscious bias. I wonder whose shoes

Eddie Izzard and Grayson Perry walk in, and what they 

have understood by so doing...

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I love what you billet-doux to me...

****************************

"No, chérie, a love

letter in French isn't a

French letter, OK?...

****************************

('A very special Frenchship': 17 Syllables) 

------------------------------------------------------------------

Not only are supermarkets not as clean as they should

be, they're not as dirt cheap as I'd like, either...

------------------------------------------------------------------

Maybe I've got a dirty mind, but when Rudy Giuliani

says he was merely *ucking his shirt back in, I believe

him. He's a man who likes to take asterisks...

------------------------------------------------------------------

A dozen or so Barbarians face police action for 

breaking Covid-19 Government regulations. Let's hear 

it for the Baa-baa black sheep!...

------------------------------------------------------------------ 

'The Three Just Men' (or just three men?)

--------------------------------------------------

I bet a fair few Tories, tired of the PM and his Health

Secretary, long for a magic lamp whose genie could

grant them 3 Rishis...

------------------------------------------------------------------

vegan name-droppers...

***************************

if you really want

to upset a vegan, call

him 'butterfingers'...

***************************

(17 Syllables)

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Can you really lose weight by eating MORE? (news

item). Indeed you can. I was 93 kilos when I started

'reverse dieting', and I'm already down to 104 kilos...

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Welsh supermarket no-go zones: how soon before

the rest of the 'non-essential' British aisles are forced

to follow suit?...

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Who's been a naughtical buoy, then?...

----------------------------------------------

Members fear sacking Prince Andrew as Commodore 

of the Royal Thames Yacht Club would be far from 

plain sailng, haha...

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