Knock it on the head, lads...

*************************************

My brother and I

were always out clubbing. Till

PETA objected...

*************************************

(People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals)

(The Blubber Clubber: 17 Syllables)

--------------------------------------------------------

If you slap your bother on the bottom and he 

takes it on the chin, just slap him on the chin 

and maybe he'll take it on the bottom...

--------------------------------------------------------

You only live twice...

********************************

I was young once. Twice,

if you count last Saturday.

What a day that was!...

********************************

(17 Syllables)

You shouldn't have. No, really, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE!

******************************

If your children are

gifted, is it morally

wrong to re-gift them?...

*******************************

(Vincent Hefter, Daily Mail, March 2: 17 Syllables)

Why, oh why, did they christen him Dai?...

***************************************

BRINGING UP THE RHEA -

what the newborn's mother will

be doing for a while...

***************************************

(17 Syllables)

Convenience food...

***************************************

PLASTIC BAGuettes may

lack taste, but they're certainly

easy to carry...

***************************************

(17 Syllables)

Nadhim Zahawi's dodgy tax dealings...

***********************************************

MPs should ALL should be

whiter than white, right? - "Hey, don't 

bring race into this!"...

***********************************************

Rosie's are red - not sure what colour Violet's are...

******************************************

Pills may well have got

Rosie Green through HER divorce -

Pils got me through mine...

******************************************

(Vincent Hefter, Daily Mail, January 25: 17 Syllables)