look, he's waving...

*********************************************

swimming with dolphins
is cheap - swimming with sharks can
cost an arm and aaaaaarrggghhhh!...

*********************************************



('Went out sober, came back legless': 17 Syllables)
---------------------------------------------------------
A few breast strokes on a first date probably
means you're getting along swimmingly, haha...
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Old folk CAN bite back, Mr Paxman - if they've got
their dentures in!...(Vincent Hefter, Daily Mail, July 5)
-------------------------------------------------------------------

#MeToo...

*****************************************

you know you need help

when you've hit the bottom - and

the bottom's not yours!...

*****************************************

(17 Syllables)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pillaried: just how many Greek columns does your bungalow need?...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

non compost mentis...

***************************************

my dad's confused - "you
have to know your onions when
you grow carrots, son"...

***************************************



Compost mentis: able to follow the instructions on a bag of fertiliser...



(17 Syllables)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
'Steph Houghton Mrs Penalty!' (England Mr great opportunity - what a miss)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

COMPOST MENTIS: I'm

in complete control of my

potato peelings...

TV meal for one: tagliatelly! (That's another)

************************************

Pasta jokes? They're 10
a penne, mate (but that's the
only one I know.)

************************************



(17 Syllables)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Abridge Too Far: biopic about a cut-throat features editor...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Red Sea, Black Sea, Nausea...

********************************

Our last cruise on a
liner was RUBBISH. Liner?
BIN liner, more like...

********************************



(17 Syllables)
------------------------------------------------------------
Trump? In-ept? In-secure? In-competent? Is that
what being part of the In-crowd means?...
------------------------------------------------------------

what's on the telly, love? - an ashtray, honey...

****************************************

We've watched telly on
and off for years. Jane when it's
on, me when it's off...

****************************************



('Not a great telly lover': 17 Syllables)

not another PICA$$000,000!...

*************************************

Wherever he went,
Picasso drew large crowds. In
pen and ink, mostly...

*************************************



(17 Syllables)
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Italic type. After so many sexual assault claims, probably
the only type Donald Trump can safely admit to fancying...
("not my type", my arse)
------------------------------------------------------------------------