Wordy Wise (Vincent Hefter, Daily Mail, February 24)

------------ o ------------

KNIGHTCAP - helmet,

KNIGHTFALL - occupational hazard when jousting,

THE STILL OF THE KNIGHT - that'll be the one he uses to make whisky,

KNIGHTINGALE - Sir Lancelot caught in storm,

KNIGHT NURSE - never tends to mere commoners,

KNIGHTCLUB - no title, no entry,

KNIGHT RIDER - Sir Gordon Richards,

TWELFTH KNIGHT - sub in knights' first XI,
KNIGHT WATCHMAN - bit of a comedown, but needs the money,

LADY OF THE KNIGHT - his missus,

A KNIGHT AT THE OPERA - Bryn Terfel,

STAG NIGHT - Deer Sir, 
THE KNIGHT IS YOUNG - Sir Andy Murray,

THREE-DOG KNIGHT - is Sir Andy thinking of getting a third?

THE KNIGHT HAS A THOUSAND EYES - the doctor will see you now, Sir,

SILENT KNIGHT - mime artist honoured by the Queen.

------------ o ------------

The loner...

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Life's a party, they

say. If that's the case, I wish

I'd been invited...

***********************************

(17 Syllables)

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People say Tiger Woods would never have crashed

had he used a driver. I'm not so sure. He's always 

had a problem with drivers...

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Much enjoying Jean-Claude Van-Tam's latest role 

as England's deputy chief medical officer. He's 

certainly gor the accent down to a tee...

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Talking of dementia, Gordon Taylor's lucky. However

tricky things got for him, years of heading the PFA

were never as traumatic as years of heading a 

football might have been...

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better still, cast an eye on a thesaurus...

**********************************

He who is without

synonyms, let him cast the 

first thing rock's made of...

**********************************

(17 Syllables)

Whatever floats your boat, I guess...

******************************************

What! TWO superyachts?

It seems there's 'rich...very rich...

and ABRAMOrich!'

******************************************

(17 Syllables)

--------------------------------------------------------------

The times they are a-changin': who needs clever 

literary plots these days? No one's Waiting for 

Godot any more, they're waiting for Gadot - in her 

next outing as Wonder Woman! Yeah, baby...

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Following Ribena's lead, isn't it about time conventional

straw polls were replaced by recyclable paper ones?..

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It's not that good, then?...

******************************

my memory's great -

I can't remember when I

last forgot something...

******************************

(17 Syllables)

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Pimlico: there was I thinking I had a plum job. Seems 

Charlie Mullins's is plumber...

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Fond as I am of the White House's two alsations and

No 10's Jack Russell, I do rather miss President Trump's 

poodle. What is Mike Pence up to these days?...

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'Carry on working from home,' says Boris: WFH till June? WTF!

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In sickness and in health...

*************************************

"I've got this strange lump

on my side, doctor" - "It's your

husband, Mrs Jones"...

*************************************

("Am I dying, doc?" - "Well, of boredom, possibly": 17 Syllables)

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(1) "This is a hammer blow," say Tory MPs of Boris's 

'roadmap'. If they really think we're screwed, it must 

have been a screwdriver, surely?...

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(2) "This is a hammer blow," say Tory MPs of Boris's

'roadmap'. Talk about hitting the nail on the head!...

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The Bow Group may well be concerned about Carrie 

Symonds' role at No 10, but who's looking into the undue 

influence of Dilyn the Dog? The Bow-Wow Group?...

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***********************************************

"Having children brighter than me is a 

cross I'd bear gladly," I told my wife. 

"But what if the cross-eyed bear was 

also brighter than you?" she laughed...

***********************************************

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Posh Spice's fashion firm may well be in the red, but

I'm pretty sure it's the most stylish shade...

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Reading about bitter Tory in-fighting just served to

remind me that the pubs are still closed. Not sure

which I miss more - the bitter or the inn-fighting!...

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A £72 bottle of perfume that smells of nothing?

Makes no scents...

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