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My German friend loves
telling Bad Württemberg jokes -
though some aren't THAT bad...
***************************************
(17 Syllables)
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How lucky of a photographer to come across the lesser
spotted PM and his wife at the Arundel Wetland Centre.
All I spotted were a couple of tits. Mind you, they were
sitting in a boat...
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What now? Dinner with a Turkish fixer? Poor old
Fergie: when it comes to putting her foot in it, she
really is the archetypical™ 'Istanbul in a china shop'!
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America may well have given Rishi Sunak a green card,
but how soon before Boris or the British public give him
a red one? I fear he's already on a yellow...
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A £2,369 cashmere jumper may well be beyond my meagre
budget, but ultra-successful Claudia Winkleman doubtless
calls hers her latest 'petty cash'mere purchase!...
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Thank heavens trans rights campaigners have finally
renamed Edward Lear's famous poem 'The Owl And
The KITTY-Cat'. About time people stopped pussyfooting
around the subject, if you ask me...
(Vincent Hefter, Mail on Sunday, April 17)
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Gary Neville was a one-club man. I wonder if it's the
same one he now seems intent on bashing us over
the head with, whatever the subject matter...
(I'm not a great fan of his - I prefer forward thinkers,
not defenders)
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To commemorate Portman Dental Care founder Sam
Waley-Cohen's historic Grand National victory, maybe
they should rename the Canal Turn the 'Root Canal' Turn?...
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#NumptyNuptials. Apparently, Daddy David was beside himself with
Victoria, Harper, Serena, Venus and Eva...
"Wasn't Joy invited, then?"... #BrooklynBeckhamWedding
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Are there any words in the English language Harry and
Meghan don't want to trademark? Silly beggars™
(For those who are reading the paper after the watershed, substitute
the words 'silly beggars' with the words 'stupid twats'™)
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